Teach our boys to be respectful men.

Teaching our boys.

“What can I do to shape my son into a respectful man—one who doesn’t assault women, most importantly, but who also doesn’t make lewd jokes, grab butts, mock victims, or generally treat women as if they’re inferior?”

How do I teach my son to treat girls with respect?

“Aren’t the people best positioned to prevent sexual assaults the people who usually commit sexual assaults in the first place?” Melinda Wenner Moyer


A Women’s Resource Centre for which I volunteer my expertise told me, “Women don’t need to learn self-defense, society needs to change.”

A year later I was approached by the new director, a psychologist, who asked me to volunteer. I did, and was saddened to discover fifty percent of the group were teens, all of whom I knew.

These survivors had spent a year with weekly counselling sessions with a female staffer before their advocates deemed them ready to learn skills to prevent a occurrence.

At no time did the counselors discuss male society changing.

Boys who are raised to not show emotion can become violent adults. “Research suggests that it’s the men who’ve felt the need to suppress their emotions who are most likely to become violent adults.”

Strategy No. 1: “Teach our boys to be,” comfortable as possible experiencing and discussing emotions.

Strategy No. 2: Teach your kids to set and respect physical boundaries.

University men treating women with respect.

Strategy No. 3: “Teach our boys by,” modelling respectful behavior and regularly engage with your kids about what that means.

Families can watch age appropriate television dramas utilizing a teachable moment during a scene where women or girls are treated in a demeaning fashion.

Portrait of six teens in classroom background green board

Read Parents, you can be the instrument of change.

About lazeejjs

Jonathan McCormick holds a Black Belt in Combat Martial Arts. He is a U.S Marine (Inactive), trained with famed CIA operative Rex Applegate and Ultimate Fighter Champion Royce Gracie and was the director of the Institute of Defense Tactics. He is a former member of the American Society of Law Enforcement Trainers and worked with members of various law enforcement agencies in the areas of suspect control and officer safety. He has written for law enforcement magazines BlueLine (www.blueline.ca) and Twenty-Four-Seven and has been a guest writer for the Vancouver Province. “Wyoming Secrets”, “30,000 Secrets”, “Santa Barbara Secrets” and The “J” Team Series are inspirational novels which focus on women who feel overwhelmed by the threat of violence in their lives. View the Series
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One Response to Teach our boys to be respectful men.

  1. My Mom was relentless and used some of the teaching techniques mentioned above. Of course I didn’t realize it then but she was an excellent teacher.

    I got into a number of fights as a kid when I stepped in to stop the harassment of a fellow student, both male and female.

    I didn’t always win the fights and those that I lost and sometimes got suspended for, my Mom would be there to support me.

    One time she was so angry she went to the principal and chewed him out because I was punished for what she felt was doing his job, managing the school.

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