Updated: Mar 24
Watching television news which always begins with negatives, can be addicting to the point of affecting our outlook on life.
This is often noticeable with the morning news which many of us begin our day and it affects our behavior immediately.
Whether it be reacting to a family member's comment, work commute or interacting with colleagues and later with our partners, the negativity began with the news.
The Power of Positivity offers the following guidelines to escaping a negative lifestyle.
This (negativity) sets you up for a negative mindset to gain a stronghold in your thoughts and actions. It can affect your friendships, your work, and your decisions. If you struggle with being overly negative, it’s crucial to find ways to let it go, especially of the more destructive types of negativity.
1. BLAME SHIFTING
Blame shifting is blaming others or situations for your own failure. Studies say blame shifting is a tool people use to push away criticism. But the same study found that blame shifting usually backfires because people don’t like blame shifters. Think here of politicians who make sweeping campaign promises, then blame others when the commitments aren’t met, even though it’s their fault. Blaming your spouse, kids, or your upbringing is a form of negativity that weighs you down and distorts your view of life.
HOW TO LET GO:
The next time you’re tempted to blame someone or something, stop and make a decision not to blameshift. Allow yourself to accept the situation and admit your own fault when needed. Find peace in letting go of this negative attitude. 2. BEING A PERFECTIONIST
If you are a perfectionist, then you want to do things in an utterly perfect way. You set high standards for yourself and others. No one is perfect, and to set your goals on perfectionism is unrealistic. It’s a negative view of yourself because you’re afraid you won’t be accepted by others if you don’t look and act correctly.
HOW TO LET GO:
Perfectionism is a deep-seated negative view of yourself. Here are some simple new habits you can try to begin breaking free from perfectionism.
Admit your weakness to others
Don’t compete with other people, decide not to compete
Practice gratitude for who you are
Pray when you’re tempted to be critical of yourself or others
Use mindfulness to relax and find peace
3. SELF-DEFEATING THOUGHTS
Negative, self-defeating thoughts are those negative thoughts you believe about yourself. These thoughts chip away at your confidence. They bombard your mind with statements like:
I can’t do it, why bother trying?
I always mess things up. I’ll mess this up too.
I’m not good enough.
I’m a hopeless mess.
I’ll probably fail as I’ve done before.
When you have self-defeating thoughts, you become your own worst enemy. If you had a friend that uttered these things to you, you would question the friendship. So, don’t talk to yourself with these negative thoughts.
HOW TO LET IT GO:
Please pay attention to your thoughts when they cross your mind. Review what caused you to think like this, then make a choice to let go of them. Here are some additional items you can try to help reverse your self-defeating thoughts.
Ask yourself why you’re thinking this way.
Change your negative thoughts with positive ones. Instead of “I can’t do it, why bother” say, “I can always try.”
Talk to yourself, don’t listen to yourself. Tell yourself what’s real instead of listening to lies.
4. JUDGING OTHERS
Judging others is a form of negativity because it’s an effort to feel better about yourself at the expense of others. Being critical of others, seeing their faults, and assuming you’d never be like that shows your own insecurities. It would help if you felt better than others because of your uncertainties. Judging shifts the focus off of your faults so you can find fault in others. This negativity destroys your relationships. It kills your self-esteem and your ability to see yourself correctly.
HOW TO LET GO:
Refuse to judge others. Assume you don’t know people’s story so you shouldn’t come to a conclusion.
Choose to understand the other person’s situation.
Be accepting of others. No one is perfect, so don’t judge people by those criteria.
Choose to love others and love yourself.
5. FEAR OF FAILING Noone wants to fail, but if you have a fear of failure, it paralyzes you. Fear of failure keeps you in from reaching out at work, in relationships, and in every part of your life. Fear of failure blinds you to your true potential. This negative mindset holds you back from really living.
HOW TO LET GO:
It’s easy to get overwhelmed, so set small, reachable goals for yourself. Accomplishing small goals leads to achieving bigger goals.
Make a list of your failure fears. Figure out what will happen if you fail. You may be surprised to see that failure isn’t the worst thing.
Others have failed big time only to bounce back and succeed. Tell yourself you can bounce back. You can overcome any failures.
Don’t believe everything you think. Just because you think it, doesn’t make it real. Your fear of failure is a lie you are telling yourself. Please do not believe it.
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