“Kate” was six months out of a 15 year marriage.
Kate was 34.
She thought it was time to meet someone new.
She was right…and wrong.
“I thought, ‘Oh, it’ll be fun to try online dating,’” she remembers.
“She says he was nice, at first, but red flags popped up almost immediately, things that she pushed aside, hoping she could help him through. He had just gotten out of a relationship with a woman who was a heroin addict. She had left him with their two young children, a 2-year-old daughter and a 5-year-old son. Kate says he didn’t seem all that attached to his children, or affectionate, something that struck her as troublesome.”
RED FLAG IGNORED!
“…he seemed to have a hatred for women in general, often spewing sexist rhetoric about how women were given unfair advantages in life, how they wanted equal rights and then still needed help from men.
RED FLAG AGAIN & IGNORED.
“His parents were very odd. His dad bossed his mom around, and his mom was a pushover. His dad was very chauvinistic. He was their only child.”
Insults and demeaning comments. RED FLAG AGAIN & YET IGNORED.
“It felt like it went bad fast. He called me worthless, a loser, no wonder my ex-husband didn’t want me.”
ARE YOU ASKING YOURSELF WHY THIS RELATIONSHIP WASN’T TERMINATED IMMEDIATELY?
Two years later.
Love and Fear Convinced Her to Stay
“Several years passed and things never seemed to get any better. In fact, Kate was starting to have regular panic attacks, though she didn’t connect them at the time to his abuse. She said her gut feeling was the things that were happening were very wrong, something her abuser tried to talk her out of.”
Kate stayed on…then she ended up in the hospital riddled with bullets.
“But the 911 operator kept talking, asking Kate if her abuser was still there. She said yes. Did he have any guns? She said yes, he had a gun on him. She turned around at that moment. Her abuser was facing her, pointing his gun at her head.
Kate ducked. The first bullet hit her in the right shoulder and she fell to the ground, the 911 operator still on the phone as her abuser shot her at least six more times.”
Read how she survived. Domestic Shelters
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