It’ll never happen again.
He says he’s really sorry.
It’s my fault I made him angry—I should be a better partner.
He’s just stressed out right now.
He’s only controlling because he loves me.
“The Cycle proposes that domestic violence starts with tension building in a relationship before an “explosion” occurs—the actual incident of abuse—followed by a “honeymoon phase” where the abuser is apologetic, even romantic, promising the abuse won’t happen again. Soon after, the tension starts building again and the cycle repeats itself indefinitely.”
Power and Control Wheel, was developed by the Domestic Abuse Intervention Project after interviewing hundreds of survivors. “We documented the most common abusive behaviors or tactics that were used against these women. The tactics chosen for the wheel were those that were the most universally experienced by battered women,” say project organizers. They say the reason they focused on female survivors and male batters is because statistically, men commit 86 to 97 percent of all criminal assaults, and that women are 3 ½ times more likely to be killed in domestic homicides than men. However, many of the tactics in the Power and Control Wheel can be the same in same-sex relationships where abuse is occurring.
Power and Control Wheel