When to dump him. Six RED FLAGS you made a mistake.

When do you know?

How about when he farts in front of you?

Or, asks you to dinner and you end up at a fast food joint?

You convince him to take you to a fine-dining restaurant. You take time choosing the perfect outfit, and he arrives in jeans, unshaven and wearing a ball cap.

Substance abuse and violence require an immediate exit.

Katherine Heigl knows: Kathrine Heigl knows a loser when she meets him.

All of this and you still have a relationship? Why?

Here is Darla Murray with Cosmopolitan magazine.

“You hate the sound of him chewing and are a little bummed he still doesn’t know your favorite flower (peonies!), but are those deal breakers or just signs of being with someone for a bajillion years? According to Marina Voron, licensed marriage and family therapist, relationship red flags have less to do with actual behavior and more to do with the feelings and intentions behind them. Here, Voron shares six reasons it may be time to cue Adele and call it quits.”

3. Your S.O. becomes disrespectful.

When you start being spiteful, critical, or belittling of one another, it’s no bueno. Contempt is the no. 1 predictor of relationship combustion, Voron says, and it’s something that couples may not notice if it happens gradually over time. Look for mean-spirited sarcasm — that’s a huge red flag.

Cosmo shares their choices for RED FLAGS.

Cosmopolitan’s RED FLAGS

About lazeejjs

Jonathan McCormick holds a Black Belt in Combat Martial Arts. He is a U.S Marine (Inactive), trained with famed CIA operative Rex Applegate and Ultimate Fighter Champion Royce Gracie and was the director of the Institute of Defense Tactics. He is a former member of the American Society of Law Enforcement Trainers and worked with members of various law enforcement agencies in the areas of suspect control and officer safety. He has written for law enforcement magazines BlueLine (www.blueline.ca) and Twenty-Four-Seven and has been a guest writer for the Vancouver Province. “Wyoming Secrets”, “30,000 Secrets”, “Santa Barbara Secrets” and The “J” Team Series are inspirational novels which focus on women who feel overwhelmed by the threat of violence in their lives. View the Series
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3 Responses to When to dump him. Six RED FLAGS you made a mistake.

  1. Devon says:

    While I admire your efforts, I have an issue with your last line, “so you can get out of what you should never have gotten into in the first place.”

    No one enters a relationship knowing it’s going to abusive. While I love that you added things to be wary of, you end by putting the onus on the victim, not the abuser, and that’s the problem when people such as yourself – who have not had to suffer being a victim try to speak to those of us who have.

    I love that you have shared this post because it’s one more person standing up and saying “I believe you deserve better” that is truly awesome, I would just suggest you be careful as it is incredibly difficult to convey tone through words on a computer. Thank you for your effort, it really does matter.


  2. lazeejjs says:

    Thanks Devon. You are absolutely right. I rely 100 percent on counselors who work with survivors to help me understand in order for them to participate in the next step in recovery. There is no way I can understand the position of a survivor but as Cosmo mentions, there are signs and this post was an attempt to share those signs in an attempt to be proactive rather than always reactive, which is my position as a defensive tactics instructor.

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