Category Archives: Sexual assault survivors

SHELTERSAFE CANADA

Shelter Safe is an interactive site. Just click on your province or territory and follow the prompts. There is a Shelter near you. Make the call if you are being abused.

“Before I called, I had no idea what I was going to do.
Now I have a plan and I know where to start.”

It is a safe and welcoming home that accommodates women and their children when they are fleeing violence. Shelter addresses are kept confidential so that women (and children) cannot be found. You can generally stay in these homes for up to 30 days and sometimes longer. There are no charges for you to stay there.

Shelters provide women fleeing violence with the critical support services that will help them make their transition to a life free of abuse. Shelter workers liaise with a number of providers in the community to help women and their children and ensure that they have counseling support and health care.

Staff and volunteers at shelters are there to listen, to offer you emotional support, information and referrals to other services you may need such as legal, financial, medical and housing. In many homes, staff will help you with transportation to appointments and will ensure that children get to school. The women residents generally share household tasks and cooking.

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Paid leave for sexual and domestic assault survivors

The provincial government is considering paid work leaves for victims of sexual and domestic violence.

Parliamentary Secretary for Gender Equity Mitzi Dean says the province is considering changes to the Employment Standards Act to do so, and says public feedback is now being taken online.

She says victims of domestic and sexual assault need to rebuild their lives.

“I remember when I was an employer of about 20 professional people just a few years ago, when one of my team members came to me on a Monday morning and told me that she had been raped on the weekend. Someone had put the rape drug in her drink on the weekend. She wasn’t able to be productive at work, she needed time away,” Dean says

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Posted in Domestic Abuse, Sexual assault survivors, Sexual Assault/Harassment, Survivors | Tagged , , , , |

“LGBTQ and Domestic Violence Leading facts and statistics on the LBGTQ population and domestic violence.”

The facts about LGBTQ partner abuse/domestic violence are often hidden by numerous myths and misconceptions. Common myths and misconceptions include the belief that women are not violent, that men are not commonly victims, that LGBTQ domestic violence is mutual, and that there are no significant differences between heterosexual domestic violence and same-gender domestic violence. However, people who are lesbian, gay and bisexual have an equal or higher prevalence of experiencing intimate partner violence, sexual violence and stalking as compared to heterosexuals.

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Sexual harassment at work, a teen’s perspective.

“Verbal abuse was the most common form of harassment for both men and women with 13 per cent of women reporting they’d experienced abuse in the preceding year.”

This is why many hospitals and clinics have conspicuous signs reading, “Violence and abusive language will not be tolerated”.

Staff need to be trained in delivering acceptable dialog to deescalate but also to have an emergency button to call security.

I taught psychiatric nurses defensive tactics which are usable against either verbally or physically aggressive patients. Their union had requested the training when repeated appeals for improved security were ignored by hospital management.

“Sexual harassment was most likely to affect women, with four per cent saying they had experienced unwanted sexual attention in the workplace, compared to fewer than one per cent of men.”

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Posted in Assault survivors, Sexual assault survivors, Sexual Assault/Harassment, Women's Rights, Work place safety | Tagged , , |

Sexual assailant says he will never feel remorse for his victims.

“I will never have remorse.” Bill Cosby

Bill Cosby, “America’s beloved father figure” speaks his truth and that of far too many criminals of his ilk.

“He said, “my political beliefs, my actions of trying to humanize all races, genders and religions landed me in this place surrounded by barb wire fencing, a room made of steel and iron.”
His victim(s) waited 14 years for his incarceration.
“Cosby, 81, received his sentence after being found guilty of having drugged and sexually assaulted Toronto woman Andrea Constand in 2004.” Charles Mason
“Look down at me and you see a fool; look up at me and you see a god; look straight at me and you see yourself.”

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Posted in Assault survivors, Date Rape, Domestic Abuse, Hollywood, overcoming it and finding courage, Personal Safety, Rape Culture, Sexual assault survivors | Tagged , , , , , |

Canada’s RCMP offer advice and video support for survivors.

From the Yukon, Brenda Butterworth-Carr is the Commander of British Columbia’s “E” Division, the largest in Canada. “In a crisis situation, victims of sexualized assault need to know what their options are, whether they want to report it or not,” says Collyn Lovelace, co-ordinator of the Yukon Women’s Coalition. “Knowing what to expect is a huge part of making an informed choice.” “The videos walk victims through the step-by-step process of reporting domestic violence and sexual assault to police. They also explain what the court process is, including what the … Continue reading

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Crappy childhood? Didn’t we all?

There are crappy childhoods, then there are traumatic ones. We need to move on. You were raised by bigots, but you got over it. Your parents were/are racists. You are not. Write them out of your life and move on. You were physically abused as a child. Now you are an adult. Don’t perpetuate the behavior with your own children or those of others and move on. “A lot of people do have tragic childhoods. But you know what? Get over it.” Phil McGraw But what if you can’t? What … Continue reading

Posted in Sexual assault survivors, Sexual Assault/Harassment, Survivors | Tagged , , , , , |

Domestic violence and substance abuse are linked. Learn how.

How Domestic Violence and Substance Abuse Are Connected “Domestic violence and substance abuse are intimately linked and often occur simultaneously. They are related much in the same way that co-occurring mental disorders like depression and anxiety are linked to increased drug use and vice versa. Often one is a symptom of the other, and in many cases, they go hand in hand. Yet while they’re intertwined, one doesn’t always precede the other. Abusing drugs doesn’t always spur aggressors to physical or emotional violence, and being a victim of abuse doesn’t … Continue reading

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Posted in Domestic Abuse, Sexual assault survivors, Substance Abuse, Toxic Relationships | Tagged , , , , , |

Male aggression. Controlling it…female style with defensive skills.

Excerpt from “Wyoming Secrets.” Female defensive skills. Penelope and Rebecca are at a dance club with their girlfriends, enjoying a girls’ night out. “While eating, two guys came over and asked them to dance. Between mouthfuls, Rebecca said, “Thanks fellas, but no, this is a girl’s night out, maybe some other time.” The men persisted, trying to coax at least one of the women to join them on the dance floor. The foursome’s refusal seemed to fuel the-would-be suitors and they kept on and on until finally Rebecca stood up. … Continue reading

Posted in Bullying, Sexual assault survivors, Sexual Assault/Harassment | Tagged , , , , , |

Assault Survivors. How can you help when they aren’t ready?

“Your sister/best friend/coworker/neighbor discloses to you that he or she is having “relationship difficulties.” With a bit more digging, you come to learn these difficulties are actually domestic abuse—psychological, emotional, verbal, sexual — there may even be physical violence occurring. Your heart drops and your anger level rises. You jump into advice-giving mode: This is what you’re going to do now, you say, and you begin counseling your friend on how to leave their partner.” Domestic Shelters. Educate, Listen & Support, Reassure & Remind Read Sue Villilo, CHOICES for Victims … Continue reading

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Posted in Domestic Abuse, Sexual assault survivors, Sexual Assault/Harassment | Tagged , , , , , , |