“14 Misconceptions About Domestic Violence”

After a video surfaced of football player Ray Rice punching out his then-fiancée Janay in an elevator, domestic violence has been at the forefront of the national conversation.

When the couple married, many asked, “Why would she stay with him?” Twitter answered back with #WhyIStayed and #WhyILeft, in which survivors shared their stories of why they remained in abusive relationships and why they eventually got out.

Yet misconceptions persist — that abuse is a private matter, that women who stay with abusive partners are simply weak-willed, that women are just as abusive as men. Cosmopolitan.com talked to the experts to clear up some of the most stubborn, and most dangerous, myths about intimate partner violence.

1. Domestic violence is unusual.

One in four women, and 1 in 7 men, will experience relationship violence in their lives. From 2003–2012, domestic violence accounted for nearly a quarter of all violent victimizations.

“Many people think domestic violence is uncommon and it hardly ever exists anymore,” Katie Ray-Jones, president of the National Domestic Violence Hotline (NDVH) and the National Dating Abuse Helpline (NDAH), told Cosmopolitan.com. And even the stats we have are just for physical violence, and don’t take verbal and emotional abuse into account. “One woman told me, ‘I can still hear his voice in my head. Even though I’ve been out of the relationship for three years, I feel like I’m still sitting there,'” Ray-Jones says. “It really has long-term impacts on a woman, and it takes a really long time to heal from.”

While still common, incidences of domestic violence, along with other crimes, have decreased significantly since the mid-’90s. There’s less social acceptance of it; women are more economically independent and mobile and therefore better able to leave; and there are more services for survivors, including Ray-Jones’s hotline, which you can call at 1-800-799-7233 or find online (they also do live chats). That’s been good for both women and men: Fewer women are victims than in previous decades, and fewer abusive men are killed by their wives — now, the wives can leave, instead of thinking murder is the only way out.

https://www.domesticshelters.org/articles/domestic-violence-op-ed-column/14-misconceptions-about-domestic-violence#.WnTTtJM-eAw

Our appreciation to Domestic Violence for sharing his vital information.

Please share that we may all learn and remove violence from our society.

About lazeejjs

Jonathan McCormick holds a Black Belt in Combat Martial Arts. He is a U.S Marine (Inactive), trained with famed CIA operative Rex Applegate and Ultimate Fighter Champion Royce Gracie and was the director of the Institute of Defense Tactics. He is a former member of the American Society of Law Enforcement Trainers and worked with members of various law enforcement agencies in the areas of suspect control and officer safety. He has written for law enforcement magazines BlueLine (www.blueline.ca) and Twenty-Four-Seven and has been a guest writer for the Vancouver Province. “Wyoming Secrets”, “30,000 Secrets”, “Santa Barbara Secrets” and The “J” Team Series are inspirational novels which focus on women who feel overwhelmed by the threat of violence in their lives. View the Series
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One Response to “14 Misconceptions About Domestic Violence”

  1. I’m not currently in a relationship but when I attended Michigan university I was part of a group of male walkers who would escort female students to their dorm rooms. I listened to far too many stories of abusive boyfriends and I believe post like this can educate those who have limited or zero knowledge of these disastrous events.

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